Battle of the bulge...

As the song goes, ‘Tis the season to be jolly and also one to eat, drink and be merry. Probably not a prudent time to begin a diet right? Well, in an effort that bucks this trend, your old pal Coach Neil Tarangioli and often visible College Racquet Club patron, a man of an endless list of astonishing facts, Mark Keye, have decided to engage in a competition...a battle of the bulge if you will, although not to be confused with the 16 December 1944 - 25 January 1945 major German offensive launched towards the end of World War II by the same name.

It seems as though these two fine men are sporting a few extra pounds as of late. As a result, the two have collectively decided to enter into a friendly wager. The contest my friends is simple. They will compete to see who will lose the most weight by 15 December 2009. Of course, there is the possibility that one or both of these portly fellows will actually gain weight during this period and I am not sure what the judges will rule is if that occurs. By the way, I am not sure if there are judges, but I do know that I would refuse that dubious distinction.

The tale of the tape as of 30 November 2009:

In the red (red for the hair color of course) corner is Coach Neil:

Initial weight: 182.5 lbs

In the blue corner is Mark Keye:

Initial weight: 248 lbs

I have discovered through reliable sources close to the contestants that each is opting for a specific strategy so as to drop some of the chubby. Coach Neil has selected an Atkins program. For those not familiar with the Atkins Diet, it boasts weight loss by eating a strict diet of protein and fat while eliminating any carbohydrate consumption. Coach has had varied results with this program in the past. We shall see. Rumor has it that Mark is opting for a program of moderation. He will try to limit most of everything and be cautious with the sweets.

The competition will end with the weigh in on 15 December 2009 and we shall see who will be eating crow, and who will be taking home the spoils as the winner.

So, if you should run into two grouchy men at the CRC, you will now know why. Let’s wish the fellows the best of luck and see what results in a few weeks. In my opinion, it falls in the category of “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Nuff said...